Its been quite a while since you've read a personal post from me hasn't it, I only know because for the last 'I've lost count amount of days', I've been writing reviews and competition post in regards to my big blogaversary giveaway!
I still can't believe Unique Young Mum turned one on the 2nd of August, I am amazed and so proud at how far the journey has come along. Blogging isn't as easy as some of you may think, I know a few people who have started blogging for the perks only to give it up as it wasn't as easy as what they thought it would be. These people who I will not identify, saw and heard about all the 'free' things I received and wanted to get in on the action themselves.
I don't have a problem with anyone I know taking up blogging, nor do I have a problem with people I don't know who take up blogging, what does annoy me, what really makes me grit my teeth is the people who go about with this theory in their head that blogging is extremely easy. I like many other bloggers have personal lifes too, we don't spend 24 hours a day, 7 days a week on our blogs.
I am a parenting blog and most of the blogs I read are also parenting blogs, this means I have a little person to take care of, a little person who can not look after himself properly. My little person, can not make his own breakfast, lunch or dinner, he can't go out by himself, he can't have a bath without being supervised (it can take seconds for a child to drown!), he can't make cakes by himself, or have a conversation by himself, go to family and friend gatherings by himself, go to school by himself and so much more.
Not only do I have a little person to look after who does need caring for 24/7, because night-time doesn't mean my parenting duties have finished, I have to be prepared for the un-prepared with each minute of the day, I also have a home to look after, and myself. I'm 23, I'm still classed as young, and although I handed over a lot of my life rights to have the most wonderful blessing of all - parenting, I still need me time, I still need a break, to remember I am not just a mum but a individual person too.
Sometimes I wonder why I waste the rare child free nights I have, because over this last week, I've discovered something. I don't know who's real anymore, everyone around me just seems sneaky at the moment, I don't know who's being themselves and who's being fake. I dis-like being confused, I dis-like having mixed emotions and I very much dis-like negativity.
A few days ago, I posted a status on my personal Facebook about people having more children when they can't afford to have them, I'm not being funny but if you can't afford to have children then why would you go and get pregnant!? Here in the UK, contraception and protection are free thanks to the NHS. Anyway, my personal Facebook status created quite a stir, I don't like judging others, but I am frustrated to keep seeing the same things around me. I do not regret what I said, nor do I regret posting it, everyone is entitled to their own opinion and why anyone would want to have another child to add to their brood knowing they can't afford their existing brood as it is, is simply beyond me! I will never understand these strange people, I don't think I'd like too understand them either.
I think, well, I'm pretty sure I have my priorities set out in life, I didn't have time to be the immature teenager most of the UK's adults have been through, I fell pregnant at 15 and gave birth to my beautiful boy a month before my 16th birthday. I didn't have to mature as such as I was quite mature anyway, but I knew from that moment onwards, I could not be immature ever again. Now 7 years on, I am still learning and discovering new things about me on a regular basis. This week I realised I am far too nice to people, I help whoever I can, as long as I can and when I can.
Sometimes, I take time out of my life, time I don't really have if I'm honest with you, to help others, sometimes people have asked for my help, and sometimes I can just see or sense they need help. It gives me a sense of pride, to know I have at least tried to help someone, but you know what, when your own rubbish hits the fan, no one is around. I'm not saying I want help, as I like to try and do things myself, sometimes I'd just like a hello how are you Jada/Jade? Sometimes I'd just like to write to someone and put a :( and hope they could be a virtual shoulder to cry on, or even a real shoulder to cry on.
I've learned this last week, I have some people who I once thought of as really close friends are in fact just two faced, back stabbing let downs. I've learned that the people who you thought would never be dodgy, are fraudsters claiming benefits whilst having working partners living with them. I've learned as long as these sad people can get baby essentials for free, they don't care about their children's upbringings, nor the fact that they can't afford to have more children, but it gives them another 5 years to not get a job, so they don't care.
I sometimes wonder, if I won the lottery, who would fall at my feet? How many people would come out of the wood work? Oh I imagine there would be plenty of people, I doubt it would be hard to find a boyfriend, I doubt it would be hard to find a husband. I wouldn't know who's real and who's fake, what if fate brought someone along who was genuine, coincidentally shortly after I won a huge amount on the lottery. I wouldn't think this person's genuine, I'd think they was in it for the money. What about the few men who have knocked me, they'd soon regret their decision, and I have no doubt they would soon come to try and crawl back.
I have no idea on people anymore, and for that fact, I think I only have one thing to do, I need to stop helping everyone, be selfish and quite simply treat people how they treat me!
There's just one problem, that isn't me!
Until next time,
Jada x
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